Oh, You.

You are always there... I'm so lucky to have something that I cannot see, because my faith in you makes my faith stronger in myself. It is easy to commit the sins that would seem to make us feel better. It is harder to fight the temptation of giving up. I hurt when I cannot feel you with me.. I question whether your absence is because I am unworthy, or if it is to make me understand my worth alone. 

I'm surrounded by sinners. By liars, delinquents, offenders, trespassers, adulterers, and I'm surrounded by thieves.  I pity them. I pity those who dangle temptation in front of themselves, commit their sins, and expect that closing their eyes to pray will be enough to erase the guilt inside. How can those who blatantly disrespect you say that they are unaware of the blasphemy taking place? How can people get better and be better when they allow the domination of bad to take place? But how can I judge them?

I have been in those shoes before. I have stood upon every sin, every temptation and every ignorance with audacity, and with valor! I have weighed my options and chosen that which left me with a heavy heart, but today I choose the latter, the lighter; the Light.

I am not a judge and dare I wear that mask I should only find myself so guilty! Thank you for giving me the power of forgiveness. Thank you for making it a choice. Thank you for bringing angels into my life to show me the possibilities and the heights that my happiness can reach, but thank you more so for bringing me demons. You could have raised me to be a blind follower, yet instead you've opened my eyes wider than I comprehend. I know not every evil that charms its way into my journey, but I have every knowing to defeat them. You are endless strength and immeasurable patience. I will not let your vacancy leave me empty anymore. I will use my fears to fuel the fire in my heart, so that when your warmth comes I can recognize it. I will be calm, and speak kindly so that when you speak I will know your voice. I will carry you with me when I need to be carried. Thank you, Spirit.

i absolutely love you,

love, me.